How much space do you need? Consider space requirements when you are shopping for a house. Space is something that people require in varying amounts. If you or a family member are claustrophobic, a compact house with smaller rooms and limited hall and walkways may be less suitable than one with open space, super-sized rooms and windows that bare all. The latter would be unsuitable to the less secure individual. Pay attention to detail. A finished basement, appliances, soundproofed walls, and other similar luxuries may be appealing, but you have to judge whether the house you are looking at will comfortably sustain your family.
Is there room for the hobbies you and your family enjoy? Is there space for that plush sectional you always wanted and your parents agreed to buy as a gift for the new house? Will the kids have room to grow, and is there room for company? What about that home computer system you want to buy...where will you put it? Most importantly, is the space in the house appealing to you? Before you sign the dotted line, be sure you are comfortable in making this house your home.
"Peace is more important than all justice, and peace was not made for the sake of justice, but justice for the sake of peace."
Peace. Peace and quiet. Isn't that what we return to our homes nightly for? After dealing with the stresses of the outside world, isn't it nice to cuddle up on a couch or chair in "peace?"
However, peace is not always what we find when we go home. Sometimes we find our homes full of conflict, and it may seem that we cannot go home without facing a debate about something. This doesn't have to be the case.
Preserve your peace by choosing which debates are really necessary and which ones aren't. Make sure to talk to people who consistently bother you rather than blowing up at them when you reach your breaking point. Try to look for other ways around conflicts. Your home should be a haven, not a judgeless courtroom. Balance out your conflict for the sake of peace.
You love your parents with all of your heart. When they can no longer live by themselves and come to live with you, your family can adjust. There are emotional, financial, and space issues to consider. Remember, your parents are used to living on their own and taking care of you. It is often difficult for them to deal with turned tables. Be patient and keep the lines of communication open. There are bound to be challenging moments as you restructure your lives. If your parent need or feel more comfortable with certain items (a special chair, foot stool, bedroom set, breakfast food, etc.) do your best to make it available. A home can be made more convenient for an elderly person with relatively minor changes. Consider getting lever door handles and water faucets instead of knobs. Keep a phone and a lamp on their nightstand along with a large print list of important phone numbers.
You will find that Mom and/or Dad will function just fine once their basic needs are met and they feel like an active participant in the household. Include them in some of the decision-making. You will be surprised at the wisdom and experience that they can offer you. Adding an older member to a household can enrich the lives of all members of the family.
